But that's not what happened.
December's PET scan showed the lymphoma had expanded to new and bigger territory. A clear progression. Especially to my chest where now the biggest nodes are. I was surprised, and shocked! Because from March to June, it had only slightly progressed, then in June I started so many new things that were supposed to help it. A few of them I had great faith in because I read of others having good results. Granted, this PET scan covered a much longer time frame -- 6 months of time, not just 3 months -- a long time for even a partly aggressive cancer.
Emotions were all over the place, as they tend to go from time-to-time with Stage IV. It was a Macy's parade of happy faces, sad faces, dramatic clowns of every size and shape on parade to show me the folly of having expectations. In Buddhism, it's the quickest way to suffering.
Now, I'm not against chemo. It's always been part of my larger strategy (if needed) for the type of incurable lymphoma I have. I walk both worlds. My goal is not to avoid chemo. My goal is to do whatever needs to be done to help myself -- within the realm of what I am able to do. A round of chemo cannot cure me, not the cancer I have (relapsed Non-Hodgkin's aggressive follicular lymphoma). Many Hodgkin's lymphomas can be cured with chemo, but not mine. And this would be a stronger cocktail than I had 6 years ago. Much stronger. That part I dreaded.
When my oncology naturopath (natural doctor) saw my PET scan, she said: "Well, it looks like a new game plan is needed." Okay, yeah. Obviously. But she doesn't know what that game plan should be, or even could be. No one does. As she so correctly says: we have no answers, no one knows. Everyone is different. What works for one person doesn't work for another. I can see that now. That's part of the craziness that comes along with this whole process. How do I find, and pick, the right thing that will help me?
 |
| This is sweet Jack, 3-months old when I adopted him in December |
 |
| A great new friend for Duckie, who lost his best friend last August. |
One thing I've learned this past year. All the people who are able to cure cancers with at least partly natural means have one big thing in common. Cash. And lots of it. Few of the pills, potions, and powders (and IV's) are covered by health insurance. That's okay, I've become very resourceful and have gotten good at learning DIY in the cancer healing world. One can even make one's own IV Vitamin C bags. The possibilities are endless.
Well, waiting like that feels to me like standing in the middle of a train track and waiting for the next train to barrel down on me. Not my style. I feel better when I can DO something, when I have a plan. Not a plan for the outcome exactly, (I tried that and expectations only seem to bring disappointment), No, a plan of movement. What can I do, give me something to do! I love having the freedom and latitude with which to look for something useful that might work (albeit less and less time to search). On the other hand, what do I need to commit to for more welcome results? And how will I find it when there are no answers, and no directions. And when I don't know who to ask?
For some days, I scratched my brain, pondered wildly, went over what I could do with current strategies to make them more effective (like increase doses that I'd been a little lax on doing). And then waited for a thunderbolt from heaven. Some sign to guide me in one direction or another.
I didn't have long long to wait. One thing I've learned the past year is that when one asks for help, then opens up to receive it, something usually comes. And usually in unexpected ways.
The thunderbolt came. While researching one of my current supplements, out of the blue I stumbled on another website by a quite brilliant blogger from the Netherlands. My jaw dropped. The amount of cancer healing information on this site is mind boggling. And confirms something my functional medicine doctor said (thankfully I have a big team!) -- that the more you learn about what can help heal cancer, the more you discover the information is infinite. And I agree. It truly is. Which is wonderful and overwhelming at the same time.
This blogger lost his wife to cancer just a few years ago, and he's dedicated himself to sharing what he knows, and is continually learning. And it's all based on cancer research. His site is populated with people all over the world who are doing what I'm doing outside the box. Blocking cancer's metabolic nutrients to starve it -- with herbals, repurposed medications, and various potions.
www.cancertreatmentsresearch.com
But while my mind was busy boggling, the bunch of new large and aggressive nodes (tumors) in my chest started hurting. Okay, things were moving faster than I'd hoped. That meant the chemo would need to happen soon. But it was Christmas week and then New Year's week. Things at my oncologist's office were moving slow. Not because they were all on holiday. Nope -- all the sick people were getting worse, including me. Funny how that happens over the holidays, I've seen it before. How can such happy holidays be so stressful and wreak such havoc? But they do. And the stress affects our bodies.
I know that having chemo will bring it's own challenges. First, it feels like life will come to a standstill for 3 or 4 months with the fatigue it brings. And there will be other kinds of "work" to be done during chemo treatments to help myself through it. I also need to figure out which of my current strategies will be synergistic with it -- a lot of them actually are (like LDN, low-dose naltrexone).
This would be a stronger chemo than I had in 2014, but I know more now than I did back then on how to help myself get through it. One really significant thing (based on research) is to fast 36 - 48 hours before the chemo, then 24 hours after. It minimizes the side effects by protecting healthy cells. A fasting "mimicking" is fine, which means just eating non-starchy vegs (based on Dr. Valter Longo's research at USC). I'll explain all this more in a future post because it makes me a little happier to have that in my back pocket. And I've been practicing for a year! So now I'll need to do it every 3 weeks.
The other great strategy about having chemo (hey, thinking positive here) is that it will knock back the fast-growing cancer cells. The cancer "stem" cells remain however (which is why chemo is often not a cure, and the cancer comes back). But I'll have a clean slate then to focus on knocking out the stem cells with all the other stuff.
So chemo it is. Please keep me in your prayers... I'll need all of them. Thank you so much.
Stay tuned as I share this process in future posts. I would love it if you'd sign up for automatic email updates to this blog, top right above. Updates will be automatically sent to your email.
UPDATE: I started chemo on January 28th. I meant to post this update a week before then, but my sweet kitten Jack had an anaphylactic reaction to his rabies shot 3 days before chemo began, and things took off from there with an extra layer of challenge. He's mostly better now.
Donations. Many of you have asked what you can do to help. Most all of the cancer-healing supplements and alternative treatments that help me feel better are not covered by health insurance, sadly, no matter how well they work! Health expenses are way over and above my monthly resources. Amazon Gift Cards are so so helpful -- that's where I buy most of the supplements. To donate an Amazon Gift Card, go to the website below, click on the "Wishlist" to donate an Amazon gift card, of any amount:
To donate through PayPal, also please go to:
If you prefer to donate by mail, please contact me for the address. This would also be so much appreciated. adele72son@gmail.com
Healing Intentions, Thoughts, Prayers, and Support Needed.
Thank you all for your healing intentions and thoughts, your emotional support, and your well wishes -- all these I appreciate more than I can ever say. It means everything to me. And please feel free to post your comments below. I'd love to hear from you!
* * * * * * * * *
Thank you so much for reading this blog and passing it along to anyone you feel may be interested. I can feel your support, and I need it! I'm so aware that I'm not doing this alone. I'm connected to many many others online, in my community, in my family, all my friends. Where I get the inspiration, information, support, encouragement, and the energy to keep going.
No comments:
Post a Comment